One of my biggest fears as a wedding photographer is my bride’s not liking their photos. Over the years when I’ve talked to brides about their wedding pictures, they say they hate them and the photographer gets the blame. Often it’s not the photographer’s fault and the pictures are in fact beautiful and represent the day perfectly. Now sometimes this is not the case, and that’s why choosing the right photographer is important. It’s the photographer job to help the bride and groom feel and look comfortable. If you don’t feel comfortable to start with, it betrays in the pictures. But that’s a whole other post.
What I really hear is brides are not happy with themselves and how they look. We are our own worst enemy. We are so critical and downright mean to ourselves. I know this because I do it too and hated my wedding pictures. I would just look at myself and pick out all the things I hated. I hadn’t lost the weight I wanted too, my boobs look funny, double chin… I went on and on. But now when I look at my wedding pictures I love them more and more. I’ve learned to look beyond how I looked. It’s really how I felt and what that day meant. I’ve also done a lot of self-love work over the past few years. That’s how I looked, that’s me, the body I had at that moment on my wedding day and it was a special day.
I want you to love your wedding pictures the moment you view your wedding gallery. You should feel good about yourself on the inside and out. Let’s take the pressure off yourself in the run up to your wedding day, with these motivational tips so you will look and feel confident the day you say your vows and beyond.
Love the camera
So there are a few things we can do to help and the first is having a couples session. Love story sessions are what I like to call them. These can work really well to remove the fear of being photographed on the day of your wedding and not only that we develop more of a friendship and get to meet in person. I really think this makes a huge difference, and that’s why these sessions are complimentary in my wedding package.
The way I approach my couple’s sessions is to give my couples a simple exercise to do, by doing this it focuses them on each other rather than the camera. I encourage my couples to enjoy each other’s company and it’s the in-between moment I’m looking for. You can find some sessions here.
Learn to be happy for who you are
If you hate all pictures of yourself and the reason for this is that you have a negative self-image, practice self-love. Believe in yourself! stop! doubting! You know it doesn’t matter which shape or size you are, just believe in yourself, you will look fabulous and feel fabulous. Recognise how truly lucky you are to have found the man of your dreams and he loves you for who you are all the lumps, bumps and wobbly bits.
Start every day by looking in the mirror and only say beautiful things. Having a couple’s session is a great time to practice only picking out what you love about yourself in the pictures.
Don’t go on a diet and stop weighing yourself
I hear so much talk about diets. But I don’t want you to go down that track. I want you to develop good eating habits, this is so valuable to your mental and physical health. You want to be full of energy, serenity, and happiness.
As a nutrition and health coach, I strongly believe diets are the enemy and they only leave you with more problems, guilt, low self-esteem, low energy, and binge eating. Instead of starting a new diet on Monday, think about ways you can include more veggies, cutting back on processed foods. Don’t focus on the things you shouldn’t eat, but more on the foods you should eat and like to eat. The more you think about how bad that doughnut is and you can’t have it, you will end up eating that doughnut and more.
As for scales, they will not tell you how beautiful, amazing and wonderful you are. They will never show you how loved you are by family, friends and future husband. NO, THEY WILL NOT! GET rid of them! Body confidence comes from within. Enjoy the lead up to your wedding and wedding day, you are awesome just how you are!
Improve your self-care routine
Finding time for self-care can be hard but so so important, by scheduling in a NONE negotiable you time is such a huge investment and never a waste of time. Start off small, like a body brush before jumping in the shower, while saying positive affirmations (like how amazing your legs are and you are excited to walk them down the aisle) maybe you start off with thinking of one gratitude before you go to bed. Or you make sure you have that big drink of water in the morning. Then when you’re ready you can move onto bigger things like a hike or yoga.
It’s like a domino effect, the more kind things you do for yourself the better you feel and the more you want to include self-care, and the next thing you know it's a daily habit and a way of life.
Find a dress that fits your amazing body
It’s amazing what a well-fitting dress can do to boost your confidence. You want a dress which looks and feels amazing and that starts with buying one which fits you. Should your dress need taking in before the day, then you can find a seamstress to do that. Or find a seamstress that does custom designs. I in fact know the perfect person. Denise loves doing custom designs. You can find here.
Don’t put off buying your wedding dress until you have achieved your dream body. Yes, a wedding can be a great motivator but let’s face it bodies don’t change in a flash and as I spoke about earlier planning your perfect diet will probably stop your progress towards your weight loss goals. So start with choosing the right dress that fits you perfectly, one that makes you feel radiant in the skin you’re in.
Remember, we are replacing negative thoughts with positive ones. Measurements are only tools not a title of your worth.
Stand tall and breath
I know this might sound weird, but we forget to do these two things with intention. Standing tall can impact how we feel about ourselves. And don’t forget to breathe. Breathing in deeply helps to relax you, so a great thing to practice doing to help calm the wedding day nerves is to take deep breaths. Breath in, count to 5, hold for 2 and do this a few times. I love including essential oils while I do this too. I good one to start with would be Lavender, lavender is famous for it’s calming capabilities. It’s restorative and stable, this oil can help with anything from sleepless nights to irritability.